Entertainment Weekly Editor-At-Large Dalton Ross writes in his latest Glutton column:
Now the circle is complete. And rest assured, it is a really geeky circle.
I was 6 years old when Star Wars came out. It was just Star Wars then — as opposed to the new, not-so-lean, not-so-mean title of Star Wars: Episode IV — A New Hope. I was transfixed, and immediately made it my life's goal to collect every stupid action figure, no matter how insignificant the character. Star Wars has been a part of my life ever since. I wasn't dressing up like Dengar and hanging out at Star Wars conventions, mind you — and yes, I just name-checked Dengar — but I did see The Empire Strikes Back a good 11 times when it first came out in theaters.
Fast-forward a few decades. My son, Dale, was born in 2000. I immediately had visions of father and son playing catch and cheering at overpriced sporting events. But what I was really excited about was the opportunity to relive the Star Wars experience with someone seeing it for the first time. Although I tried this once before, with decidedly mixed results.
When my wife, Christina, and I first started dating, she informed me she had never seen any of the Star Wars movies. After spitting out my beer and asking her if she was out of her %&¢#!*^ mind, I set a schedule: three nights, three movies. The good news is, she didn't dump me. The bad news: She couldn't have cared less about the films. (Later, when we scored tickets to an advance screening of The Phantom Menace — only the most anticipated movie in history! — she fell asleep 20 minutes in. Not that meesa blame her.) I do have to give my wife serious props, however: Not only did she allow us to give the tables at our wedding Star Wars character names instead of boring old numbers, but she actually suggested it! (Another nice — if super geeked-out — touch? Putting Han Solo and Princess Leia on top of the wedding cake.)
I purposely waited until Dale reached a little over 6 years old to introduce him to the Star Wars universe — partly so he could experience the film at the exact same age I did, but mostly because he tends to get scared easily. He's still frightened by The Grinch (and yes, I'm talking about the cartoon one, not the live-action version, which actually scares me with its blatant, all-encompassing badness). Now, I know George Lucas claims that the Star Wars films are best viewed in order of episode number, but that's kinda like introducing someone to the Rocky franchise by having them watch Balboa slug it out in the middle of the street with Tommy Gunn — you're just not doing anyone any favors with that strategy.
So I fired up Star Wars... sorry, Star Wars: Episode IV — A New Hope... in the DVD player and let her rip. I have to say, I got pretty emotional, starting with the theme song and opening crawl of floating yellow text. What a life-changing moment. Some fathers teach their sons the ways of the world. Me, I make mine watch a scruffy nerf herder shoot a green alien in the groin. It was so cool seeing Dale experience these things for the first time, just as I did at the same age 30 years ago. At one point, I even came close to tearing up. I tried to play it off like I was just worried that Luke wouldn't be able get his power converters at Toshi Station, but I don't think Dale bought it. He seemed confused by my emotional outburst — almost as confused as he was by Princess Leia slipping into a phony English accent whenever in the company of Grand Moff Tarkin.
Of course, Star Wars... dammit, Star Wars: Episode IV — A New Hope!... was just the first course. Next up is The Empire Strikes Back, clearly the best one in the franchise. Then we will no doubt hit a bit of a rocky patch with the Yub-Yub-loving Ewoks in Return of the Jedi, although their annoyingness will be solid preparation for the intergalactic abhorrence that is Jar Jar Binks in The Phantom Menace. We'll finish it up with Attack of the Clones, which he's already hyper-spazzing about, just so he can see the massive Jedi-droid battle. But what of Revenge of the Sith, you ask? No way is my 6-year-old ready to see some limbless dude rolling around with charred flesh. I'm also not quite sure how I could adequately prepare him for the cheesiness of watching Darth Vader shake his fists in the air while yelling ''Nooooooooooo!'' at the top of his lungs. (Parenting is hard sometimes.)
Of course, I haven't even gotten to the biggest benefit of going through this coming-of-age ritual with my offspring — the opportunity to bust out all my old Star Wars toys with impunity. They had previously been relegated to an attic closet, after Christina came home from work one day to see a full-size cardboard cut-out of Boba Fett just chillin' in our living room. (What? Who needs a security system when you have a badass bounty hunter in the joint?) But now voice-changing helmets, lightsabers, spaceships, even talking Yodas and Darth Vader banks are back and taking over the place. Of course, there are drawbacks: It took Dale and his 4-year-old sister, Violet, approximately 13 seconds to break the lightsaber off my original 30-year-old Luke Skywalker action figure. But that is a small price to pay to share the Force with my family — even if eBay tells me otherwise.
The Empire Strikes Back Is The BEST Film In The Entire Saga
I can totally relate to the excitement Ross feels when sharing the thrill of the original "Wars" trilogy with the next generation...There's nothing better than discussing the saga with my nephew James, and watching his eyes light up, going over all of the "cool parts". And in turn reliving all of my memories with him. Priceless...
If only I had held onto all of those action figures, the Death Star play set, and the remote controlled R2D2, I owned as a kid. Sigh...
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